I just can't get my head around the "money thing". As soon as I opened the building doors my I.Q. drops by 50 points. By the time I get into his office, it's gone down another 20. This would probably be a good time for the Bach Flower essence, Larch http://pixiedusthealing.blogspot.ca/2012/02/finding-your-inner-lion.html, but I never think about that ahead of time. It's a wonder I can even choose a couple of those candies. The whole accounting, financial experience feels to me like a monopoly game. I used to win monopoly games. I did this by hoarding money, hiding money under my side of the board, and cheating significantly. But in real life, I don't even get to hold the "paper money". In fact, it feels like I never actually see it. It just gets transferred around from one place to the next and along the way, numbers get taken off and numbers get added on.
I tried to understand it today. I kept asking questions instead of just "signing and letting go". I kept telling him I couldn't "visualize" it and therefore didn't understand exactly. He's a patient guy and he loves this stuff- he's happy to explain. At one point we had labeled stickies all over the desk with numbers on them and he kept moving them around to show me. It was a great attempt on his part. At one point, I looked up from what felt like "the shell game". I had already hopelessly lost track of the prize. I realized my accountant was waving his hands in a motion I use when I'm trying to explain to someone how energy healing works. Hmm...
I kept thinking I would come home and write a posting about how the "money system" was wrong. I thought I felt a bit about it like I do the present medical system http://pixiedusthealing.blogspot.ca/2012/03/tiered-health-care.html I imagined I had a way I wanted it to be. I thought I wanted to see, touch, and feel money changing hands. I often think I'd like to do away with the concept of money all together and just trade "things" and "expertise" from one to the other. We have created quite a financial "entity" and I sort of have been waiting for it to fall. Tom Shadyac talks about this in his "I Am" movie. http://pixiedusthealing.blogspot.ca/2012/05/movie-review-i-am.html Maybe we've made some mistakes. Maybe we've put too much emphasis on it. Maybe we're way outside of what we need and have taken hoarding to a new level. But I kept seeing my accountants hands waving like that, and the look on his face. I know he feels about this like I feel about some alternative healing modalities. The system works.. Hmm...
I realize that the accountants office for me feels the same no matter which side of the equation I'm on. I feel the same way going in there to pay taxes as I do when I'm getting a return. Although it feels like I spend more time on the loosing side of the equation, I really have been on both sides without any change in feeling. It's never a positive feeling.
So then I thought about that Woodpecker . http://pixiedusthealing.blogspot.ca/2012/05/animal-signs-woodpecker.html Maybe it's time to beat my head on a different money tree. After all, don't I believe that true change comes from within?
When clients want to understand how healing works I try to explain. I try from multiple angles. I love to talk about this stuff. I can talk with some degree of expertise. I do have background knowledge in this, just like my accountant has knowledge of finances. But at the end of the day, it all requires a bit of faith and trust in the pixie dust. It's all about energy and the transfer of something we can't necessarily touch, see or even feel. It just is. I trust in that.
There is liberation in "just believing". Once people let go of the need for scientific proof they often find it takes less energy to feel so much better. It just happens without a lot of angst, questioning, and arguing. When you take away friction, energy flows smoothly and faster.
My bank never really makes me produce those bills or coinage it would seem. I don't have to walk around with pieces of gold, or potatoes, or items of trade in my pockets. On the really big ticket items, it seems my signature does the trick. Hmm.. imagine that! There is something to back it I guess. My bank seems to have faith and trust that I'll be able to keep finding ways of making those numbers float around enough for them to switch it over to somewhere else. Just like there is some evidence to back alternative healing and energy transfer. But it isn't always tangible. It's something you feel. It's about trusting and letting go.
I guess if I stop trying to hide my money under shells and heavy items, it might find the wings it needs to magically be transformed. And perhaps I'd feel myself as a lighter being. Maybe my I.Q will return?
Enjoy the flight!
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